


flights of birds

by carrotycake



Series: Emilia Shepard [2]
Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Adopted Children, Adoption, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fluff, Gen, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, SO MUCH FLUFF, shepard needs a hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-15
Updated: 2016-01-15
Packaged: 2018-05-14 00:43:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5723152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carrotycake/pseuds/carrotycake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kaidan gives Shepard time to bond with their new daughter, whilst Shepard worries about the kind of mother she will be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	flights of birds

**Author's Note:**

> This is the same Shepard as the one found in my other Mass Effect fic, Sanity Check. Her full name is Emilia Shepard and she's a Spacer/Sole Survivor Vanguard.  
> I have more ideas for fics centred in this particular universe, as I think there's plenty to explore, so this is me kind of stepping into the water as far as post-ending fics are concerned. Watch this space! :)

_“What’s her name?”_

_“This one? Oh, we named her Ashley. She’s a lovely girl, but very quiet. Most of them are, to be honest. Quiet, that is.”_

_“You – you named her?”_

_“She was only a baby when she was brought here. An Alliance patrol found her in the ruins of one of the camps outside the city. Her parents must have fled the initial attacks, but it was a lost cause. They had no identification on them, nothing to tell us who they were.”_

_The nurse paused, her cheery demeanour dropping slightly. “We’ve had to name most of the younger ones ourselves.”_

_Kaidan looked at Shepard, and she could tell he was thinking the same thing as she was._

_“Ashley...” Kaidan murmured, and Shepard squeezed his hand._

_“Something about that name?”_

_Shepard shook her head. “An old friend. We lost her a long time ago.”_

_The nurse tutted sympathetically. “Who hasn’t, nowadays? It’s a pretty name, anyway. Can I show you around the rest of the facility?”_

_They looked at each other again. No, they’d made up their minds._

 

* * *

 

 

“I’ll take these upstairs,” said Kaidan, gesturing to the bags sitting in the hallway. “Will you two be alright on your own together?”

Shepard looked at the toddler sitting quietly on the sofa. She hesitated, gripping her crutches. Kaidan caught her uncertain expression and bent to kiss her on her forehead.

“I don’t know what to do,” she whispered, feeling tears spring to the back of her eyes. What were they thinking, adopting a child? She could barely hold herself up without the aid of crutches, and she still relied heavily on painkillers to keep her back from aching. Distant memories of her mother picking her head and swinging her around her head sprang to mind. She would never be that for this child.

“Shepard. Emilia.” Kaidan smoothed her hair, running his hand through the tangled mess of red, “We wouldn’t have done this if we weren’t ready. You can do this. I’ll just be five minutes.”

She sighed, shakily. “Okay. Five minutes.” She squeezed Kaidan’s hand before letting him go. He smiled reassuringly, and she had to marvel at his faith in her.

Turning back to the two-year-old on the sofa, she took a deep breath, and moved awkwardly to sit next to the little girl.

“Hello,” she said, gently, and a pair of wide brown eyes turned to look at her, “This is going to be your new home now, okay? I hope – we hope – that you’ll be very happy here. A-and you’re going to be well looked-after, I can promise you that.” Shepard wrung her hands together, trying to hide her nervousness.

The girl – Ashley – blinked once, and cocked her head to the side like a puppy. Shepard had yet to see her smile, but then she supposed Ashley hadn’t had the best start in life.

“Do – do you want to play?”

Ashley frowned, her eyes focused entirely on Shepard. “Play?” she repeated, slowly.

Shepard nodded. “Yes. What do you want to do? Um. Your choice.”

The toddler raised a tentative hand and pointed it at one of the large windows. Shepard looked in the direction of a chubby, outstretched finger and grinned, despite herself.

“That’s a UT-47 Kodiak shuttle,” she said, “I’m very impressed.”

She got up, and hobbled over to the window. Watching the shuttles fly past reminded her of her time in captivity. She’d spent many of her hours doing just that, learning their flight patterns and routes and the particular noises they all made. Thinking about it now reminded her painfully of her old crew. She hoped they were doing all right.

Ashley hopped off the sofa, and shuffled over to stand next to her, enraptured by the cityscape.

“I like...ships,” she managed, pointing again.

“Are those ones your favourites?” Shepard asked, giving up on her crutches to sit down on the floor next to her new daughter. The girl nodded.

“They fly. I want to fly.”

“Someday, I’ll make that happen,” smiled Shepard, feeling several months’ worries fall away as she watched Ashley’s little face stare out over the Vancouver skyline, hands pressed up against the glass.

Brown eyes met hers again. “You can fly?”

Shepard laughed. “No. But I know people who can make you fly. I was born on a ship. It’s in my blood.”

 _And yours too, now,_ she thought, but she didn’t say it. “Here, I’ve got an idea.” She reached for a stack of papers sitting on the coffee table. They were probably important, but she didn’t bother reading what was on them.

Settling herself on the floor, crutches temporarily abandoned, Shepard fiddled with a sheet of paper, folding it the way she’d been shown as a child. Ashley watched her as she worked, her little face frowning in confusion.

“Aha!” After a few minutes – along with a few crumpled-up balls of paper, and some muttered curses – Shepard held up her creation: a paper aeroplane, like the ones kids would play with in the 20th and early 21st centuries. It had been Hannah Shepard who had first shown her how to make them – for all that they disagreed with each other, she had been a good mother. She considered getting in touch with Hannah; after all, the war was over, and Shepard had read in the news that her mother had recently retired. Perhaps it was time to put their differences behind them.

Shepard’s train of thought was interrupted by Ashley shuffling closer to her, the toddler’s curiosity getting the better of her. She wasn’t sure if this is what mothering was, but she was starting to enjoy it.

“Ready for the _Normandy’_ s maiden voyage?” She held up the paper ship, the words _SSV Normandy_ scribbled hastily in pencil on the side. Ashley nodded seriously, her eyes fixed on the ship. “Okay, here it goes...”

The paper aeroplane did a slight loop-the-loop and flopped to the floor, its nose bent from the impact. Ashley giggled and clapped her hands together.

“Again!”

Shepard passed her the paper aeroplane, and watched as Ashley screwed up her face in concentration and hurled her entire body weight into the throw. The plane floated to the ground in front of them. Looking at the wreckage, Ashley frowned, and looked at Shepard.

“Didn’t fly.”

“Aw, no, that’s not true,” said Shepard, hastily, picking up the now-crumpled paper ship, “See, look, it’s flying again – whee!”

She mimicked the noise of the _Normandy_ taking off, holding the paper aeroplane and making it circle over Ashley’s head.

“Shhuuummm, shhhuuum...” Ashley started to copy Shepard’s poor attempts at ship noises whilst grabbing for the paper aeroplane. She would have to blame Tali for that one.

“Nope! It’s flying away now! The _Normandy_ needs to fight the – to fight the, uh...” Shepard swallowed, hating the way that her hands had started to shake. She was almost angry with herself – two years, and she still couldn’t bear to think of them. _The Reapers._

“...the bad people,” she finished, lamely. Thankfully, little Ash didn’t seem to notice, picking up the plane that Shepard had thrown again and giggling as it nosedived into the couch.

“Well, Joker’s not going to be happy about that,” said a voice from behind them, and Shepard jumped.

“Kaidan,” she said, struggling to stand again, “How long have you been standing there?”

“Long enough,” he smiled, crouching down next to her instead. She caressed his cheek gently, letting her legs go again so she could sit. They watched as Ashley disappeared into her own little world, now using the discarded balls of paper as extra props in the _Normandy_ ’s latest mission.

“I think – I think she’s going to be alright.”

Kaidan slipped a hand around her shoulders, and she leaned in to him. “Yeah,” he agreed, “I think she will. As will you, you know.”

Shepard nodded. “Yeah. Thank you, Kaidan. I mean it. I couldn’t – I wouldn’t have been able to do this without you.”

“Nonsense,” he said, “You’re stronger than you think, Shepard. But – I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

Maybe their little family would work out, after all.

**Author's Note:**

> If you like it, please kudos/comment because that always makes my day! I'm also available at itsacuriousthing on tumblr if you have any questions! x


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